I don’t watch movies very often and there’s not even a television in my house, so I don’t often get exposed to the extreme sensory stimulation that these sources provide. Am I missing out? Some might say yes. But for the most part I think I’ve found many better things to spend my time doing. However, when I do watch a movie now, because I’m not so over stimulated, it can often be a very powerful experience.
Over the past year, I often feel that I’m in the fast lane, pedal to the metal with my personal evolution. It’s a wild ride and I totally love it. About 10 days ago, I watched the movie Beyond Borders, a love story of two humanitarian workers. All in all, it was a great movie, but far beyond that, it planted a seed of realization deep inside of me that I feel to be infinitely powerful- Life is so delicate, I could die tomorrow. I genuinely feel that this may prove to be the most powerful and empowering realization that I have had in my life so far. We’ve all heard so many times “Live this day like its your last” and other such phrases, and though I always understood them, I never understood them, meaning I never felt them resonate at the depths of my soul like I did this time. I now see that I have to live every moment with the full realization that I could well die tomorrow and must act accordingly! Far from making me fearful, this has wiped away all of my fear. Living this way is truly living on the edge and as the old saying goes “If you’re not living on the edge, you’re taking too much room.” Recently I read quote from Bob Dylan that my mom wrote down when she was my age- “What is money? A man is a success if he gets up in the morning and goes to bed at night and in between does what he wants to do.” This is one of the best quotes I’ve ever read- but it only achieves perfection if what you want to do is really what you would have wanted to do on your last day.
If I die tomorrow, will I be completely happy with how I have lived in my last day? What do I have to do right now so that if tomorrow marks the end of this life for me, I know I lived as fully as this universe allowed me to and served my complete purpose? This new approach fully liberates me to go big in all areas of my life, especially those which are most aligned with my true purpose. Once this realization fully sinks in all the way, there is no holding back! And that is one of the most amazing things I have ever felt!
This has major implications in both the realms of work and play. The two areas where it becomes most exciting, though, are truth and love. On what may be your last day, there’s no time for anything but the truth, the full and deepest version of it. This goes far beyond just speaking honestly. It means being true to yourself and others in thought, word, deed, and intention. To me, being true to others and myself means doing whatever is necessary to make every interaction “real.” 99% of all of our interactions are so superficial, just barely scratching the surface of the depths of each others’ realities, so rarely ever really “seeing” each other. Of course those deeper realms can be sensitive areas, delicate, often with past trauma and pain. But when we can work through these past things and fully open to every interaction, it makes every moment, every word, every breath so much more meaningful. We have to start on the surface with each other, but we should only stay there as long as we have to. Once you begin descending to the depths of real connection with other people, really feeling and seeing them on the spiritual level, you just start wanting to live at that depth and realize that anything more superficial is just not worth it- especially on your last day! If you had 24 hours to go, wouldn’t you want to connect fully, openly, and deeply? To see and be seen? This depth of connection is where you really find the truth.
Now for the implications of this realization as it pertains to love. Many people often talk about being rich or wealthy with love. I have been blessed to always have had so much love in my heart, which by this definition makes me a very wealthy man. Here are some true statements (from a wonderful recent blog by David Wolfe) about wealth and feel free to replace the word “wealth” with “love” and see how perfectly it works!
•True wealth (love) cannot be hoarded, only shared
•True wealth (love) is not created by what one has acquired, but by what one gives away
•And true wealth or happiness in oneself (love) is directly proportional to the happiness (love) that one brings to others
If this is my last day, there is absolutely no option- the only way is to love completely. 100% genuinely, unconditionally, and whole-heartedly in whatever way possible. When my time is done, I will know that I loved as fully as I possibly could. It is now inconceivable do anything less than give complete love. I don’t mean to make this sound simple or easy, because it definitely isn’t. I really believe in the lesson taught in James Redfield’s The Celestine Prophecy about love. Love is a super-powerful energy of which we can hold onto great amounts, but not infinite amounts. We have to be able to replenish our reserves, downloading directly from the universe in order to be able to give consistently and abundantly without ever depleting our reserves. The best way to do this, in my experience, is to have meaningful experiences in nature. If we can do this every day, even better! This reconnects us to the source from which we came and allows us to love without limits. And on your last day, don’t you want to be able know that you loved without limits? There are many ways of giving love and I will find along the way that people often aren’t ready, prepared, or comfortable receiving love in certain ways at this moment. This may change or evolve in that person over time, but I can’t be attached to that change. This lesson has come to me several times in the past year and I am now finally completely understanding. Instead, I get to let go of that attachment and figure out how I can give that person love and take that route to give it fully! If someone isn’t open to love in words, I will give total love with my eyes and smile. If someone isn’t open to physical love, I will give total love with my heart and spirit. I will always find a way because this is the most important thing in life. This way, when I exhale for the last time, whether that comes tomorrow or in 3000 years, I will know in the deepest depths of my heart that I loved completely. There are many ways to die, but what matters most to me is to die knowing this as my deepest truth.
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